my story

It started as a crush. A crush that I wrestled with to not lift me in the clouds. Stephen was cute; he had big eyes, long eyelashes and adorable lips. He dressed like he was 25, already held a steady job, slicked his hair back and was stick skinny. It was hard to bottle up this crush. My purpose in life at the age of 15 was to honor God, serve my parents and family and to not get distracted or wrapped up in a boy, or a crush. I had my mind set that I was saving myself for the one that I would marry, if I weren't ready to get married, why get wrapped up in someone? Now, I don't write this to boast, or to say that if you do things differently than me that you're in the wrong. I say this to let you know my story and hopefully offer some encouragement to those of you who are not yet ready to get married but hope to in the future. God has been good to me. And I will say that if you choose to let God take over your life, in relationships and everything else, He will bless you whether you see it or feel it now, He will.

In addition to our families doing a lot together, Stephen and I shared the same group of friends. We did a lot together with a group that varied from 6-12 of us between the ages of 14-25. Game nights, youth group, movies, shopping trips; that's how our friendship began. It remained simply friendship for a couple of years. Neither of us had any idea the other possibly "liked" the other one. As I said before, I knew that I wasn't of an age to get married and so I made a lot of effort to not let this crush of mine show. I didn't want Stephen to know I liked him. Why? There was no reason to give a piece of my heart to any other man than the one that would be my husband. Because there was no reason to get emotionally entangled with a boy that might someday be somebody else's husband.

A crush is healthy and natural but when you begin revealing a crush, you may become emotionally attached and this is where trouble may come. A relationship can be a wonderful thing, in God's timing. I didn't want a relationship to come in the way of my relationship with God. It was hard to sit back and not be flirtatious. I saw other girls flirting with the boy I liked and of course any teenage girl likes attention from the boy she has a crush on but I held back. I wanted to help him be the man God called him to be. He was my friend and a true friend would want the best for him whether I would someday become his wife or not. It was also hard to accept the fact that God deals with us each individually; my job is to honor God. What others do, is not my business. As long as I am honoring God, seeking Him and trusting Him, I don't need to worry about my future. I don't need to worry about whether that boy I like will one day like me back or if he'll end up marrying that flirt down the road. God loves me and has a plan for me. I simply need to do my job and let Him do his.

I did spend time praying for Stephen. As a friend that I liked, I prayed that God would keep him, guard his heart, equip him perfectly for his wife, and help him keep his eyes on God until he was ready to marry someday. I have prayed this same prayer for my brother, sister and friends. This prayer was not me asking God to make him my husband but rather a prayer asking God to bless him and his future spouse.

Most of you know that my sister is 2 years older than I am. Therefore, she and Stephen are the same age. She was my best friend and therefore we did everything together. Around the time I was 17, Stephen seemed to be popping up more and more often. He'd show up at UPX (my dad's business that I worked at) and would buy ice cream or a Starbucks Frapuccino for whoever happened to be working. He would call and see if he and Shawn could come play cards or a game of Scrabble. This is the funny part, he began hanging around more which was a little indication that he may be interested in a girl at our house but there were 2 of us girls. Which did he like? He was so reserved that we couldn't tell if he liked me or Tara or maybe we were all just good friends having fun!

It was harder than it sounds to not let my emotions out. To not try to get Stephen's attention. To let him know that I liked him just as much as that other girl. So many times I wanted to say, "I like you too. Don't fall for her." But I didn't. I sat back and watched, and waited.

When I was 17 1/2 years old (I have to add that 1/2) Stephen met with my dad to discuss getting to know me better to see if he could win my heart and possibly marry me. I didn't know he met with my dad. At that point, I honestly still didn't know if he was seriously interested in me. That evening, after youth church (we were both part of the leadership team at that point) was theater on the lawn night. Everyone (families from the church) brought lawn chairs and watched a movie projected on the side of the building. Rocketman was the movie. I was sitting with some friends and Stephen seemed to be walking around aimlessly. He seemed to be approaching me and then he'd walk past. Here's a little blurb out of my journal: "...Stephen comes up to me and asks if he can have a word inside with me for a minute. Of course I say 'sure'. We get inside and now I can tell he is nervous, he just didn't seem the same and this is what he said, 'well, I met with your dad for lunch today...and I wanted to know if you would allow me to try and win your heart?' I replied, 'I would.'" To Stephen, this wasn't the ideal spot to ask a girl if he could pursue her but that day, when he spoke with my dad at Ocean Palace, a couple of ladies within the church (Alison W. & Sara G.) were at the very next table, possibly eaves dropping! Stephen said he didn't want a rumor to get started so he had to act quick. It was that night that I began to drift into the clouds. It was a little awkward at first because we had been nothing more than good friends for a long time. When he came over the first few times after that we sat on the opposite couches. We had a lot to figure out. We held hands for the first time a few weeks later and it was wonderful. All of those moments were so special to us because we'd never shared them with anyone else. This period, that many call courtship, was wonderful. We desired our parents and families to be a big part of this time. We didn't do anything alone, always with family and/or friends. It may seem odd but when we went places, we drove in separate cars. We wouldn't watch a movie unless somebody else was watching it with us. Certain rooms in our houses were off limits (such as bedrooms). We were friends trying to see if we were marriage material. We weren't lovers yet. We didn't want to go to far and we still wanted to make sure we didn't get too emotionally attached as we weren't engaged yet!

Over the next months we talked about life, our future, our goals, our dreams and 4 months later we were engaged. We shared our first kiss (neither of us had ever kissed anyone else before) after becoming engaged. Not even a year after he requested my permission to try to win my heart, I was all his, walking down the aisle at the Tivoli fountain in Olympia. I have no regrets over our relationship. I have no regrets over any boy-girl relationships I was in. I had friends and one of those friendships grew into love and Stephen became my husband.

It is by God's grace and faithfulness that my life and my story is so beautiful. My story wouldn't be the same without having wonderful parents who spoke wisdom and encouraged me throughout the years. I am so thankful that God chose to bless me. My life has faced very few hardships and I know it's not because I am good, or anywhere near perfect. It's because God's grace is sufficient and He loves me. He saw a young girl, with many faults, that wanted to see what would happen if she left her future in His hands rather than her own.

5 years down the road, I am still in the clouds. Stephen is so sweet to me. He is a perfect gentleman. He still has those handsome eyes and adorable lips. I've changed his hair do a little and fattened him up enough that he's no longer a stick. He holds a steady job, manages our duplex and still finds time for side jobs and projects here and there. He is a great daddy, a wonderful chef and extremely smart.

...for some reason he chose me. I am his happy wife.

five years ago...

It was 5 years ago that Stephen and I tied the knot. We've had so much fun together. Everyone says how hard marriage is the first couple of years and for us, that wasn't relevant at all. It was all natural for us. I truly love Stephen more now than ever before and I am looking forward to spending the rest of my life with him.

Praise the Lord!

A wonderful husband and a great daddy

Stephen surprised Pear and I with treats today when he came home for lunch. He brought me a beautiful bouquet of sunflowers, and for Pear, the most scrumptious looking chocolate covered donut with sprinkles! What a wonderful husband I am blessed with and what a wonderful daddy Pear has. We love him so much! Pear loves to make daddy proud. She recently has really enjoyed putting on pretty dresses and then she wants to go "show daddy." When she gets her hair fixed, she wants to be adored by her daddy. She walks over to him and points to her hair. Stephen tells her what pretty hair she has and how beautiful she looks. Of course, Pear learned all of this from mommy, as I do the same thing and Stephen never seems to run out of admiring words.

Thank you God for blessing this family with such a wonderful husband and daddy!

A day in Seattle

Stephen and I celebrated our 4th anniversary over the weekend. Our actual anniversary isn't until Thursday, July 31st. I can't believe it's been 4 years! And, at the same time, it seems like forever. I am so thankful to have such a wonderful husband. I grow to love him more and more every day.



My parents offered to watch Pear over the weekend so that we could get away and have some alone time. This was the first time we've ever done that! It was so nice. We started off by going to Cafe Besalu in the Ballard district of Seattle, (the best bakery around,) for pastries and coffee. I enjoyed a pain du chocolat and cocoa. Stephen enjoyed a pain du chocolat, an apricot pastry with cream and a cappuccino. We ate leisurely and enjoyed watching people and the master chef in the back perform his work of art in forming more fresh pastries. It was so delightful.
While in Ballard, we walked around and browsed through a few shops. I found that I really enjoy the Ballard area. It is my new favorite spot. There are all sorts of boutiques, restaurants, art shops, coffee shops and a little bit of anything else you can think of. It was great fun!
Ray's Boathouse is right there in the Ballard area as well and we found that to be a lovely spot for lunch. We were impressed with their food and service. I chose to have Ling Cod & Chips and Stephen had the Sable Fish. Yum!
I have been wanting to explore the Fremont area of Seattle, so this was our next stop. I found it to be nice but I don't like it as much as Ballard. There are more eccentric shops and a lot of vintage shops in this area.

We had dinner reservations at 5:30 at Crush; a restaurant that has great reviews and is supposed to be a nice, romantic spot. We were not disappointed. The food was amazing! A bit expensive but amazing. I had Lobster Tails with Gnocchi as an appetizer. Stephen chose Octopus with Pork Belly. Both were delicious. For our entrees, I chose Rare Seared Scallops with an aged cheese risotto. Stephen chose Lamb Rib eye with Lamb Belly and Mashed Potatoes. Again both dishes were delightful. We shared a Light Corn Cake with Fresh Ice Cream and Blueberry Sauce for dessert. Oh, what great food. This meal was one of the best I've ever experienced!





What a day! This was a true celebration. I thoroughly enjoyed myself, was very refreshed and missed Pear by the end of it. We didn't pick her up until the following morning though as we got in too late. Praise the Lord and thank you Stephen for 4 wonderful years of marriage!