Facebook Envy

Have you read any of the recent articles on Facebook Envy? I find them slightly funny and all too true. Do you have certain acquaintances who seem to have everything together and the perfect life? I have a few that make me mad (not really, but I do get a little envious) because their kids are on the perfect routine, they get solid sleep, their house is always clean, they are always having fun and they are cute to boot! Really? How do they do it? Or do they.... I don't really buy it. You know, the more I think about it, we are all sinners. We all have issues. Some are more evident than others but none of us live a perfect life. So, just in case any of you thought even for a second that this messy life I'm living is better than yours, I'm doing this post just for you. To make you happier about your own life, though mine is greatly blessed, it is nowhere near perfect. And I want to take you into the nitty-gritty, the part that most don't see or hear:

For the past 4 years, I have rarely slept for a solid period longer than 3 hours. My average total sleep per night is 6 hours.

I have some days that my kids nap well. Most of the time though, I'm lucky to get Pike to sleep for a solid hour.

I complain daily about how tired I am, (Obviously this is a HUGE crutch in my life right now,) how much I wish my kids would sleep, how much I need a break!

I sometimes send all three of my kids to their beds, they all three cry, just so that I don't yell or spank them in anger. Sometimes I just need space to think, gain patience and move on.

My toilet is dirty right now.

My floors have had spilt milk under Jovie's place at the table for 4 days now. Maybe I'll get it mopped today...maybe not!

We have termites in our wall. Gross! And it's expensive to treat. Don't worry, we're getting them treated this week. There goes my shopping spree!

Jovie asked this morning, "mom, you happy?" to which I responded, "yes. I'm happy." She then said, "you just grumpy." This conversation takes place regularly. Sometimes she responds, "you just grumpy." Sometimes it's, "you just tired." Either way, she's right.

I am sick of figuring out meals and cooking. If there were better restaurants around here, we'd be eating out every night of the week. I just don't want to think about it!

We have weeds growing everywhere! The lower lawn (if you can call it that) is completely covered in moss and honestly, we'll keep it that way because we have to mow it less.

I feel so pathetic, I haven't read a book from front to back in years. And this isn't because of kids. It's because I am lazy.

I have belly fat. Yup. I do. Three kids does that to you. Well, and the fact that I eat dessert almost every night. I am working on getting it off BUT not hard enough.

My bedroom is only clean about 2 days out of the month. It's the last on my list. It's easy to close the door when company comes over and that's just the way it is. If you have seen it clean, consider yourself lucky!

I get mad at my kids sometimes. Even little Pike. I'm not proud of this fact, just being real.

Sometimes Stephen drives me nuts! (Again, just being real :o)

I like the idea of baking with my kids. In actuality, it's a ton of work and it doesn't happen very often these days. When it does happen, I find it stretches my patience immensely.

I've wasted about 1 1/2 hours on the internet today and my toilet is still dirty and my floors have still not been mopped. Whether these things end up clean tonight, you may never know!

There you have it. This is the honest-to-goodness me. I hope you feel good about yourself. Because tomorrow, I will most likely be posting the good things in my day...all three of them! Just kidding.

If I could...

I would buy all of these things.

Pom Shift Dress from AnthropologieA complete cosmetic set from Laura Mercier

The Kapow! Boot from Modcloth

World Map from These Are Things

Berry Delight Tablecloth from House8810

The Lemonade at Lunch Dress from Modcloth

The Carly Chair from Crate and Barrel

Happy Birthday Towels From House8810

Clothbound Children's Classics from Anthropologie

But, what fun would it be to window shop if you could actually have everything at your fingertips? Yeah. It wouldn't be much fun at all...or would it? ;)

The way I am

I like this song.

come rain or come shine

Many times, I find myself living for the next month, the next season of life, the time when all my i's are dotted and t's are crossed or the day that I will have the perfect life. How pointless is that? I can strive to live a more perfect life; I can work hard to obtain a bigger house with a nicer couch; our children will grow up and one day I won't be spending every waking hour tending to spilt milk and messy pants- but how unfulfilling, to always be living for the next season. Life is not perfect. There will always be things to strive for and work on in my individual life, my family as a whole and the earth as God's creation.

So, I say this as a little self reminder: Psalm 118:24 This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. Ephesians 5:15-20 Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

In the midst of the storm when the milk's on the floor, the kitchen sink is leaking, and I can hardly stand- I choose to be happy and live my life to its fullest. And on that sunshiny day when the house is clean, my children are angels and I'm fully rested- I choose to be happy and live my life to its fullest.

Merry Christmas!

For a family who loves eating, baking, shopping, cooking, presents, decorating, crafts, hot chocolate, lattes, bundling up in the cold, reminiscing old times and gathering with family and friends, could there possibly be a more wonderful time of the year?

To say that we like food is an understatement. We love food! In our spare time, Stephen and I enjoy baking: a decadent chocolate cake with a creamy milk chocolate frosting or vanilla bean croissants (my new favorite) which take 3 days for the entire process. Stephen bakes Danish puff at least once a month and it makes it easier for Pear to go to bed if she knows she gets to partake in Danish puff in the morning. Stephen cooks up good food of all different ethnicities. He has a knack for melding herbs, spices and pairings within a meal. I don't especially enjoy Asian food, so any time I'm gone, that's what he makes for himself and the girls. I prefer to cook Italian, French, Mexican and of course American dishes. Stephen does all of these as well, (and usually better than I do, although he would never admit to it.) The bottom line is- we love food. We love having people over for meals. We love including our girls in the process of making food. We even enjoy watching geeky shows like Iron Chef America! The love for baking doesn't cease in this home. And we see this love for buttery goodness being passed down to the next generation. If you haven't been around Jovie recently- her cheeks do not lie. Her world revolves around food, especially sweet food. The excitement and joy seen on her face as a cookie appears in the room is enough to make everyone in the room stop and watch her enjoy the delectable bite she is about to take. Although Pear ingests half the quantity that Jovie does and is much more picky about the types of food she eats, her sweet tooth is almost as big and her desire to be in the kitchen baking, cooking and cleaning is very evident. It is a very familiar sight to see Pear pushing a chair up to the counter to help wash potatoes, make daddy a latte, mix a batch of cookies, frost a cupcake, salt the meat, smell the herbs, unload the dishwasher or whatever else we may be doing.

It's amazing to me that we've been in Olympia for 1 1/2 years now. Our duplex and the gift of owning a home continues to be a huge blessing, while at times causing us much grief. That may sound worse than it actually is. I guess a better way to put it is this: every time we start a new project or remodel another room, I begin to hear Pear saying words she normally wouldn't say. Words or phrases like: "piece of junk" or "freakin' dane-it". Stephen has done an amazing job remodeling, especially given the fact that he constantly has a little helper or two that he so graciously welcomes. Over the summer, he gutted our bathroom. Let's just say it was disgusting and now it is gorgeous, probably the nicest room in our house! We now have a nice front yard and an entry way with nice pavers. Our kitchen is halfway complete and we hope have it finished by spring. And the list goes on. The life of a homeowner!

Did I mention that Pear is a princess? If I didn't, take note. You may call her Pear or you may call her Princess Pear. If you mistake her for anyone else such as stinker, googly bear, pumpkin, cupcake, monkey, etc., you will get one of two things: a glare and short retort, "I'm not _____ I'm a pwincess!" or a devastated child that cries as if you are trying to shatter her beliefs and tell her that she might not be a princess, "but I thought I was a pwincess." And Pear seems to have it figured out, if she is a princess, Jovie is also a princess. Although we can get away with calling Jovie other endearing names, we will often hear the same remarks if Pear is in her complete princess mode, "but mom, Jovie is a pwincess, not a chunky monkey!"

Either I have been eating far too many doughnuts or I have a baby growing in my tummy! I think the latter to be true for two reasons: One- there isn't a good doughnut shop within a 15 minute radius. And two- I can feel the kicking of little feet right now. We are 18 weeks along and due May 13, 2010. We find out whether we'll have a little boy or a little girl on December 23rd.

Stephen and I are so blessed. We are happily married. We have 2 children (Pear will be 3 in February and Jovie just turned 1) and another on the way. We own a home (the rent from the other unit in our duplex sure does help out with the mortgage!). We upgraded Stephen's junky VW Jetta to a new Toyota van. Stephen has a great job as an Enterprise Technology Architect for DSHS. We have good health. We have wonderful parents, siblings, family and friends. As you may have guessed, having food on the table isn't a problem in this home. We have a God whose grace is sufficient and who sent his son as a baby so that we can be saved. And that same God chose us to be HIS children. Could we ask for anything more? I certainly don't think so but as the years go by the list just gets longer and longer.

Merry Christmas and may you too be blessed in Christ!

Paige, Stephen, Pear, Jovie, and baby.

A note from Stephen:

As I was reading Paige’s letter above, I kept wanting to interject my highlights and thoughts. So instead of mucking about in her sentences, I decided to throw in my notes as an addendum. Paige really did highlight the 3 major areas of our life: kids, food, and our house. Outside of that set, there were several activities that I would like to call attention to. I went on a fantastic backpacking trip in May with 12 good friends. We hiked to Toleak Point and camped on the beach. The weather was sunny in the low eighties with no wind, I had to keep reminding myself that I was sitting on a beach, on the Pacific Ocean, in Washington State, and I wasn’t wearing a parka and mittens or being pelted in the face with sand. It really was a special trip. If you want to see pictures of the trip you can visit my blog http://sbackholm.blogspot.com. Secondly, THE highlight of the year for me was going to Maui for 5 days in November with Paige. We left the kids with Paige’s parents, and did nothing but snorkel and lay on the beach the whole trip. I now see why people go to Hawaii.


Regards,
Stephen



Thanks to Michelle at Candid Reflections for the wonderful photographs.

Imagination vs. Reality

I imagine having dinner sitting on the table, the girls sitting patiently, Stephen walking through the door and greeting us and we have a wonderful dinner.
Real life situation: I'm scrambling with dinner, Pear is chanting "I'm hungry", Jovie's rubbing olive oil across the ENTIRE kitchen floor, Stephen walks through the door and greets us only to receive a harry eyeball from me, an "I'm hungry" from Pear and Jovie wants to give daddy a hug with her oiled hands but he's in his nice dress slacks.

During the girls' nap time I clean the kitchen, organize the toys in the family room, fold all of the laundry and am refreshed as the girls awake from their naps and we read a couple of our favorite children's books.
Real life situation: I get the dishes done. I fold most of the clothes Pear and Jovie wake up happy. They then decide that the freshly folded laundry is the perfect pile of leaves to jump in. I frantically try to put them away before they are all messed up only to come back to another pile of scattered "leaves" every trip back from the closet. 1 hour later- done. We didn't get to read those books. I'm not quite feeling completely rejuvenated.

Saturday morning arrives and we sleep until a leisurely hour, perhaps 6:00 am isn't too high of an expectation. We get ready and leave for a morning in Seattle at our favorite bakery, Cafe Besalu. Pear and Jovie enjoy their pastries and allow Stephen and myself to enjoy ours. We sip our coffee and cocoa and leave with a feeling of great satisfaction and there couldn't possibly be a happier family out there!
Real life situation: Jovie sleeps terribly. She decides that 4:00 am is a better hour to wake. We rush to get ready. Leave the house just a few minutes later than estimated and arrive at Besalu just in time to enjoy fresh quiche, pastries and cookies. Upon receiving our goodies, Jovie decides it's time to have a bowel movement. (For those of you who do not know Jovie, this is a HUGE ordeal.) I take my screaming child into the restroom to allow her a little privacy and 20 minutes later, cleaned, changed and much relieved, we return to our cold cocoa and finish our pastries. It could have been worse but let's just say upon leaving, I hardly felt I'd sat down and wasn't feeling ready to face the rest of the day.

I sit down to write a blog post. The girls play and I'm able to complete my writing within 30 minutes. I move on to do other things all while the girls play happily together.
Real life situation: I sat down 2 weeks ago to write this post. Pear and Jovie had a tizzy over a toy that I should have bought 2 of but only bought 1 and within minutes Jovie is crying on my lap. Once she stops crying, she begins banging on the keyboard. I then give up trying to write a post and move on to the next task. This repeats itself over the following days until I finally get the post done. (You'd think I might decide to give up blogging or decide to only do it during nap time. I guess maybe I'm crazy.)

The bottom line is, being married, having kids, serving God, living life- it isn't always a bowl full of cherries. In fact I often feel it's more like poop (you'd be surprised how literal this is for me at this point). But the fact of the matter is, for some strange reason I find satisfaction amongst the chaos. I enjoy these girls. I love my husband. And I revere God. At the end of the day as I'm laying in bed, I don't think of how terrible my day was. What comes to my mind makes me smile; I think about how I called Pear a stinker and in a devastated state she responded, "I'm not a stinker, I'm a pwincess." Or the way that Jovie lit up as I read Animal Sounds (currently her favorite book) and tried to repeat the animal sounds which in all actuality all sounded the same "uh-uh-uh". I think about how Stephen treasures me and saves a kiss for me before he leaves for work, when he comes home for lunch and again in the evening. I serve a great God who blessed me with a beautiful family. I take comfort in James 1:2-4 Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

Knife Skills

For years, Stephen has been lecturing me on how to properly use a knife. I usually shrug off his advice with knives as overly cautious which is simply not my style. That is, until three weeks ago when I was preparing a wonderful chili dinner. I was so excited. Stephen was going to love it (he normally doesn't care too much for chili). I was taking advantage of the girls' nap-time. I chopped the onions and moved on to green peppers. This is where I went just a smidge too far and chopped my thumb instead of the pepper. That put a little damper on the chili dinner, actually, it put a stop to it. No chili dinner. Luckily, I didn't have to get stitches. It bled and throbbed for hours but a good bandage job was all it needed. Just this week the feeling returned to my thumb and I'm as good as new.

All this to say: take heed to your husband's advice. Proper knife skills are a must.

"...these are a few of my favorite things."

Black pumps might be the one shoe I couldn't live without.

A big glass of ice cold milk.

1979 Mercedes Benz 450 slc. (I owned this car when I was 17, I will own it again some day.)

Cupcakes are good, any day of the week.

Black and white pictures.

Peaceful roads lined with cherry blossom trees in full bloom.

A simple, organized room with fun decor and colors.

A medium-rare ribeye steak seasoned with a little salt and pepper.

Me

I don't know how I came across Regina Spektor's music but I've grown to like her soft, funky sound. Here's a song I've been listening to lately: